Living!

January 3rd, 2026| Topic: RaMbLeS | 0

Your last words. Very important.

But perhaps even more important are the last words others say about you. Your obituary. Its words give a glimpse of how we will be remembered by others.

The average person lives about 4,000 weeks. When they die, that entire existence is usually compressed an obituary. Chosen by loved ones, those words become the final public record of a life, capturing what mattered most and what made that life worth living.

So researchers decided to take a look into this. A serious look: “An Exploration of Basic Human Values in 38 Million Obituaries over 30 Years,” published in the prestigious Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences last year. Yup, 38,000,000 over 30 years! A serious look, indeed. Asking: “What do Americans value most about a life well lived?”

For one, they discovered that …

Obituaries were 174.53 words long (standard deviation = 149.03 words), on average.”

But more important than that, tradition and benevolence seem to dominate American obituaries. Tradition (particularly religious faith) appeared in 80% of obituaries, while benevolence (caring for others) appeared in 76%, far more than achievement, power, pleasure, possessions, or the other kinds of stuff we humans chase after, thinking that those shape and make us. Nope, they do not.

For tradition, words like “faithful,” “church,” “Bible,” and “praying” showed up most frequently. When forced to compress a life into a few paragraphs, people gravitate toward what provided meaning and structure, and for many Americans, that meant faith communities and religious practice. There is also benevolence identified by words like “loving,” “devoted,” “caring,” “solid friend,” etc. These qualities also mark a person.

Also dominant, but less so than tradition and benevolence, were education, military service, and phrases describing the late lamented person as being beloved.

Of interest, men’s obituaries contained about eight more words than women’s. And older people are written about at greater length than younger people (I suppose they have more to write about).

Our findings reveal how obituaries serve as psychological and cultural time capsules, preserving not just individual legacies, but also indicating what US society values collectively regarding a life well lived.”

So your last 175 words—others’ last words about you—aren’t random. More than announcing a death, they’re also deeply intentional reports by people who knew the deceased best. They describe a life well lived!

But what do we ourselves do, to ensure a life well lived?

Watch over me, God, for I take refuge in You.
I said to Yahweh, “My Lord, You [are];my good, none besides You.”
…
Their pains will increase—those who espouse another [deity].
I shall not pour out their libations of blood, and I will not take up their [deities’] names on my lips.
Yahweh is the portion of my share and my cup—You, the One who holds on to my lot.
…
I have set Yahweh before me continually; because [He is] at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is joyous and my inner being jubilates; yes, my flesh will abide in safety.
For You will not abandon my soul to Sheol; You will not let Your devout one to see the grave.
You will make known to me the path of life; fullness of joy [is with] Your presence;
pleasures in Your right hand perpetually.
Psalm 16:1–2, 4–5, 8–11

Yup, only following God and being in his presence can guarantee a well lived life! Go for it, in 2026 and beyond!

SOURCE: Study Finds; Proceedings of the American Academy of Sciences